Unfortunately, I can’t take the credit for it. My good friend Liya Lev Oertel is the one who deserves it all. I stole the idea from her book, “52 Romantic Evenings…to spice up your love life.” OK…I’m just kidding. I didn’t steal it. I borrowed it with her and her publisher’s permission.

Having ones own personal geisha is a dream that most men seem to have in common. I’m embarrassed to admit it, but my dad and Jay belong to that group of men as well. Yes, embarrassed!

They seem to love the idea of being catered to and admired, but then again, who wouldn’t?

“Me? The modern and independent woman catering to a man?” you’re probably thinking to yourself. “I can’t be expected to serve a man and entertain him on top of that!”

Believe me, I understand your reservations because I had them myself. But trust me when I tell you (from my own experience only a few months ago), that a little pleasing will in turn bring pleasures that you’ve never experienced before! Plus, who knows, you might enjoy it.

Playing a character will help release all kinds of inhibitions!

Ok, time for the nitty-gritty. From this point on, this romantic idea is being described by Liya, in her own words. So read, learn, and take notes (kidding).

Seriously though, pay attention because you definitely won’t want to miss a single thing!

With the geisha’s beautiful kimono, elaborate hair and make up, and refined manners, it’s no wonder that western men find her exotic and erotic.

Because geisha are traditionally women, I’ve written the rest of this romantic idea assuming that you are a woman. But this evening is all yours, so feel free to reverse roles if you like. (After all, some claim that, the earliest geisha were men.) Whether you’re a woman or a man, spend this evening making your partner happy with your beauty, grace, talent, and attentiveness.

Planning Ahead:

♥Invite your beloved danna with a prettily inked scroll reading “I humbly request the pleasure of your company at your convenience on Saturday evening. Your presence will bring me much delight.”

Setting the Mood:

♥Arrange many pillows around a low table, so you can eat while sitting or reclining on the floor. A geisha kneels and sits back on her heels, because sitting on a chair would ruin her precisely arranged kimono (long, robe like dress) and obi (wide sash wrapped around the waist and tied in the back).

♥Set the table with a bamboo table runner or place mats, clusters of beeswax candles, stoneware plates, glazed bowls, and smooth stones (for chopstick holders). Use square plates for a traditional Japanese look.

♥Decorate the room with paper or silk fans, scrolls decorated with Japanese calligraphy, and cherry blossoms or simple flower arrangements. A single orchid on the table would be elegant.

♥Play Japanese music in the background. Recordings that feature instruments traditionally played by geisha, such as the shamisen (a three-stringed instrument) or small drums would be perfect.

♥Turn yourself into a geisha:

• Wear your kimono a little low in back to reveal your neck, which is considered HIGHLY erotic.

• Tie your obi in a bow in back. Only a common prostitute ties her obi in front, since she has to untie it so often.

• Wear lacquered wooden sandals with a pair of thin, split-toe socks.

• If you have long hair, arrange it in an elaborate bun, held in place with beautiful combs, preferably decorated with flowers and jewels. If you’re not up to the challenge of creating an elaborate hairdo or if you have short hair, consider renting a wig from a costume shop.

• For a traditional geisha look, cover your face and neck with white or very light powder, leaving a thin border of natural skin at the hairline. Define your brows with a charcoal eyebrow pencil. Paint your lips with bright red lipstick. Add a hint of blush and eye shadow and an exotic, subtle fragrance, and you’re all set.

• To complete you transformation, choose a geisha name. When a geisha begins her training, she takes a new name to suit her new life.

To the Heart through the Stomach:

♥Start with miso soup, a flavorful broth. Serve the soup in small deep bowls. You can either spoon up the soup or sip it directly from the bowls. Feel free to discretely (but not too discretely) run the tip of your tongue along your lips after each sip.

♥Then serve sushi. Before you say “yuck,” be aware that sushi doesn’t necessarily contain raw fish.

Sushi is a cold cake of rice prepared with sweet vinegar that may contain any type of vegetable or fish, cooked or uncooked.

If you are new to the world of sushi, you might want to start with maki, which are rice rolls containing a wide variety of ingredients wrapped with nori (seaweed).

I recommend avoiding herring, which is very fishy, and octopus, which is very rubbery. Any place that sells sushi has a chef on the premises who prepares fresh sushi as needed.

The chef can answer questions, make recommendations, and prepare sushi with ingredients you like.

• Serve two small bowls of soy sauce for dipping – one for you and one for your danna.

• Sushi is usually served with a side of wasabi, a very hot horseradish. If you choose to serve wasabi, Add a very small amount to the soy sauce and miz thoroughly.

• Another traditional accompaniment is thinly sliced pickled ginger. Its function is to cleanse the palate between each bite of sushi. Make a rule that each bite of ginger must be followed by a kiss. (What better use for a fresh mouth?)

• Eat sushi with chopsticks or fingers. Fingers allow more control, and you can delicately lick them after each bite…or maybe your danna can lick them for you after you feed him.

• Takeout sushi usually comes in a pretty plastic container; simply remove the lid and serve. Or use attractive lacquered trays.

• Take your time. Eat slowly, savoring each bite and the fresh taste of ginger between bites.

♥Drink sake (traditionally served warm) or plum wine. Plum juice and hot green tea are good nonalcoholic alternatives. Attentively refill your danna’s glass or cup whenever it’s empty.

♥For dessert, offer a fruit tray including litchis, star fruit, mandarin oranges, and any other exotic fruit you like. If you want to serve a fruit you’ve never tried, be sure to taste it before dinner. A star fruit looks beautiful, but you may not enjoy its bland taste and chewy texture.

Romance Helpers:

♥When your danna arrives, kneel at his feet and remove his shoes, replacing them with comfortable slippers.

♥Entertain your danna by singing, dancing, and/or playing a musical instrument.

Dancing with fans is especially pretty, and all you really have to do is move slowly, gracefully, and flirtatiously to the music.

Even if you feel a little silly, your danna is sure to appreciate your effort. Feel free to ask him to return the favor!

♥Research a subject of interest to your danna and talk about it during dinner (a geisha trick).

If your eyes usually glaze over when the subject comes up, surprise and delight him by not only staying awake, but starting the conversation, showing interest, and contributing relevant information.

Trust me: The effort will flatter and excite your partner.

♥If, at the end of a delightful evening, your danna wants to enjoy his other…um…rights, the rest is up to you!

So there you have it – a romantic idea that will not only please, but will also be remembered for years to come! Did you like it? I hope you did!

As Liya said, feel free to experiment with it and make it your own. Just remember to have fun and...RomanceIt!

Note: Excerpted from 52 Romantic Evenings. Copyright 2001 by Liya Lev Oertel. Used with the permission of Meadowbrook Press).